so hours before the inauguration, v.p. dick cheney decides to go visit don imus for a little chat on mr. imus' program. i'll bet it was riveting radio, and brutal television on that cable "news" channel.
so dick suggests israel might go whack iran on its own, and let the rest of the world clean up the diplomatic mess. obviously dick knows something the rest of us don't!
one thing's for sure, the u.s won't be involved in cleaning up the diplomatic mess. leave that to the euro-trash making money from the iranians - at least on the books - as opposed to the u.s., which prefers to make money from the iranians under the table.
but why is dick rattling a sword that's not even in its sheath? this is really bizarre. perhaps it's another way to win the hearts and minds of iraqis. want to make an iraqi happy? go kick the crap out of the iranians.
too bad william casey is dead. and i suppose there's no way to sneak ollie north into the bowels of the pentagon, even for just a few months. nope. we'll have to let the israelis do our dirty work in iran. that would totally kick ass!
so dick suggests israel might go whack iran on its own, and let the rest of the world clean up the diplomatic mess. obviously dick knows something the rest of us don't!
one thing's for sure, the u.s won't be involved in cleaning up the diplomatic mess. leave that to the euro-trash making money from the iranians - at least on the books - as opposed to the u.s., which prefers to make money from the iranians under the table.
but why is dick rattling a sword that's not even in its sheath? this is really bizarre. perhaps it's another way to win the hearts and minds of iraqis. want to make an iraqi happy? go kick the crap out of the iranians.
too bad william casey is dead. and i suppose there's no way to sneak ollie north into the bowels of the pentagon, even for just a few months. nope. we'll have to let the israelis do our dirty work in iran. that would totally kick ass!
by at 5:37 PM
Well, it looks like a few more than just your friends here at Knife of Simpson think Gee Dubya Bush is SPAWN OF SATAN!!!
FREE COUNT GRISHNAKHT!!!
Now let's see if the Alpha Denim Recruits can get Jenna and Babs II to strip down to their...Scandinavian Leather.
Actually, I think Vikernes could have a future in the upcoming Bushryche--how about Secretary of the NEA? If Neocondi Rice flunks as Secretary of State, maybe they should give him a call; he's gonna be paroled in 2006. He's got a long rap sheet...but hey, who in this administration doesn't?
FREE COUNT GRISHNAKHT!!!
Now let's see if the Alpha Denim Recruits can get Jenna and Babs II to strip down to their...Scandinavian Leather.
Actually, I think Vikernes could have a future in the upcoming Bushryche--how about Secretary of the NEA? If Neocondi Rice flunks as Secretary of State, maybe they should give him a call; he's gonna be paroled in 2006. He's got a long rap sheet...but hey, who in this administration doesn't?
by at 11:35 AM
I had to comment on this: Anyone hear about the so- called "America's Future Rocks Today!" pre- inaugurational concert thrown by them wild and sassy Bush twins? (America's Past Rocks Yesterday? Talk about newspeak.) AWESOME DUDE! ROCK ON! Check out this link to read more about it: http://entertainment.tv.yahoo.com/entnews/eo/20050119/110615970000.html
So much to ridicule here, I don't know where to start. Is the rock of the future really Ruben Studdard, Hillary Duff, and JoJo? And who the fuck IS JoJo anyway? We're in deeper and smellier shit than I thought.
Also, read about the kid still crowd surfing while Bush is speaking. I'm surprised a sniper didn't take him out.
My favorite is that pathetic "rock" band Fuel, who, after taking Republican money, apparently gets on stage and says "Welcome to the greatest fucking country in the world!" AWESOME DUDE! ROCK ON AMERICA!
I guess this kind of talk upset some people, and the press went to great lengths to say that the president wasn't present when the "dirty f bomb" was dropped. Can't have his royal ears hearing that filth. See Fuel, this is what happens when you're drunk in church.
I can hear the stage director talking to Fuel after their performance: "Guys, it is OK to love America. I love it too. But please don't say the f word. Only Dick Cheney gets to say that. Now take your money and get the fudge out of DC, peons."
So much to ridicule here, I don't know where to start. Is the rock of the future really Ruben Studdard, Hillary Duff, and JoJo? And who the fuck IS JoJo anyway? We're in deeper and smellier shit than I thought.
Also, read about the kid still crowd surfing while Bush is speaking. I'm surprised a sniper didn't take him out.
My favorite is that pathetic "rock" band Fuel, who, after taking Republican money, apparently gets on stage and says "Welcome to the greatest fucking country in the world!" AWESOME DUDE! ROCK ON AMERICA!
I guess this kind of talk upset some people, and the press went to great lengths to say that the president wasn't present when the "dirty f bomb" was dropped. Can't have his royal ears hearing that filth. See Fuel, this is what happens when you're drunk in church.
I can hear the stage director talking to Fuel after their performance: "Guys, it is OK to love America. I love it too. But please don't say the f word. Only Dick Cheney gets to say that. Now take your money and get the fudge out of DC, peons."
by at 10:21 AM
Lots of things going on here at Knife of Simpson. First of all, come see us at Silvies on Sunday night if you can. It is a promising new venue, and we need some new venues around here. We've got still more new songs, and it is likely you won't have to work the next day because it is MLK day! Woo hoo!
Next, we've completed a record (finally.) We're calling it "Bold as Evil." I can only describe the record as this: imagine being pistol whipped by Gary Trudeau. Right now, we're trying to figure out how to get it released, so that might take a bit. (Anyone got any money?) While we get this together, we'll be putting a track from the record online as a preview. We'll let you know as soon as that's done.
More later, I'm late for work!
Next, we've completed a record (finally.) We're calling it "Bold as Evil." I can only describe the record as this: imagine being pistol whipped by Gary Trudeau. Right now, we're trying to figure out how to get it released, so that might take a bit. (Anyone got any money?) While we get this together, we'll be putting a track from the record online as a preview. We'll let you know as soon as that's done.
More later, I'm late for work!
by at 9:50 AM
If Bush really wants his tort reform, he ought to start with this questionable lawsuit: Don King sues ESPN for libel.
Most of the material in the program had been printed or broadcast earlier about King, who has spent much of his career in court, but he said he had just had enough. "I just felt that this was the straw that broke the camel's back and I can't take it anymore, and I'm going to fight back," King said at a news conference. "I seek justice." Yeah, $2.5 billion sounds like justice to me!
OK, let's review...career charlatan (and Republican) King gets pissed, and ramrods this turd of a case through the system because somebody told the truth about him......yet a guy who loses a leg due to an incompetent doc gets his award capped at a paltry $200,000 because "frivolous" product injury and malpractice suits are driving up insurance? How fair and balanced is that? That's some small consolation prize if you need that leg to keep your job!
The moral relativism of Republicans makes me sick. Never mind that 75% of all tort cases are companies suing other companies...never mind that Texas' own caps on personal injury lawsuits actually increased insurance premiums...we've got to punish those Lib'rul trial lawyers, and those poor saps who think the system owes them something! It's their fault they got injured, the idjits!
Bush is no stranger to frivolous lawsuits, himself...take a look at this link that describes a pointless tort Bush files against Enterprise Rent-a-Car in 1999. "All animals are equal, but some are more equal than others." There's clearly a different standard of justice for the wealthy and well-connected than for the rest of us.
Hey, is my cable bill going to go up again because of King's lawsuit, Mr. Bush? Sure wish I had some fancy-pants lobby organization to represent my interests as a cable-TV watcher and fee-payer! I wonder...will King have his day in the ring broadcast on a Court TV pay-per-view? I can see it now: The Promoter of a Generation versus the Kings of Defamation!!! $19.95, only on pay-per-view!!!!!
Most of the material in the program had been printed or broadcast earlier about King, who has spent much of his career in court, but he said he had just had enough. "I just felt that this was the straw that broke the camel's back and I can't take it anymore, and I'm going to fight back," King said at a news conference. "I seek justice." Yeah, $2.5 billion sounds like justice to me!
OK, let's review...career charlatan (and Republican) King gets pissed, and ramrods this turd of a case through the system because somebody told the truth about him......yet a guy who loses a leg due to an incompetent doc gets his award capped at a paltry $200,000 because "frivolous" product injury and malpractice suits are driving up insurance? How fair and balanced is that? That's some small consolation prize if you need that leg to keep your job!
The moral relativism of Republicans makes me sick. Never mind that 75% of all tort cases are companies suing other companies...never mind that Texas' own caps on personal injury lawsuits actually increased insurance premiums...we've got to punish those Lib'rul trial lawyers, and those poor saps who think the system owes them something! It's their fault they got injured, the idjits!
Bush is no stranger to frivolous lawsuits, himself...take a look at this link that describes a pointless tort Bush files against Enterprise Rent-a-Car in 1999. "All animals are equal, but some are more equal than others." There's clearly a different standard of justice for the wealthy and well-connected than for the rest of us.
Hey, is my cable bill going to go up again because of King's lawsuit, Mr. Bush? Sure wish I had some fancy-pants lobby organization to represent my interests as a cable-TV watcher and fee-payer! I wonder...will King have his day in the ring broadcast on a Court TV pay-per-view? I can see it now: The Promoter of a Generation versus the Kings of Defamation!!! $19.95, only on pay-per-view!!!!!
by at 2:03 PM
Remember Jon Stewart's appearance on CNN's Crossfire last year where he called the show empty political theater--a beltway equivalent of WWE's Monday Night Raw? Well, apparently CNN agrees with Stewart and is cancelling the show.
HA! For all the sneers and recriminations Stewart sustained for his incendiary remarks, it turns out he was 100% RIGHT. Big surprise. Once again, how ironic is it that our nation's most trusted news anchor/journalist is a...*gasp*...COMEDIAN...and our supposed journalists are actually ill-informed, ill-tempered, bowtie-wearing simpletons? I suppose it's has always been that way...in times when journalists were more interested in maintaining their status in the DC social scene than comforting the afflicted and afflicting the comfortable, it's been the comedians and humorists like HL Mencken, Will Rogers, and Lenny Bruce who cut through the bullshit and lies and told people the truth about what was going on.
And it doesn't end there...if you wondered why all those high-profile beltway pundits start to sound the same after awhile, it's probably because Karl Rove and Ketchum, Inc., are faxing their scripts to them. My Payola. As I've mentioned before...the Republican Party never met a turd of a policy they can't polish to a golden luster with a slick PRopaganda campaign. Even though a chagrined Anderson offers a half-hearted "Muh-fault" and apologizes for getting caught, one has to wonder...how many others in the media are on the take?
Just think of the run-up to the Iraq war, when nobody in the media dared show a dissenting voice, or any trace of protest...how many of those high-priced hos in the broadcast and print media were stuffing C-notes in their garters while thoughts of swimming pools, summer homes and a new Lexus flashed in their greedy minds? How many now are cashing checks and working overtime to convince viewers and readers we need to destroy Social Security to save it?
The line between independent critic and paid propagandist has been fading for a long time now, and is in danger of being erased. The Venerable New York Times, of all media outlets, is hardly in a position to pass judgment--they should consider their employ of Judith Miller and all of her phony Iraq WMD "reporting" before casting aspersions on Anderson. Give FOX a break...at least they're honest (in a Newspeak, 1984-type way) about whose side they're on.
Expect an uproar from the press in the coming weeks...that is, if their checks from the RNC don't clear. Some will even complain that they weren't getting bigger payouts from the White House. The outrage! Poor Tucker could probably buy an actual adult's wardrobe with all that loot--certainly that blackguard traitor Novak could afford a better set of dentures and some Lee Press-on eyebrows. You guys got sandbagged!
"I can easily sit here and criticize the administration," said Anderson. Which is exactly what the White House is doing...blaming the previous administration for doing it first, and doing it worst. Hey, deflecting blame on the Zelig-like Bill Clinton has worked well for the last four years, why change tactics now?
HA! For all the sneers and recriminations Stewart sustained for his incendiary remarks, it turns out he was 100% RIGHT. Big surprise. Once again, how ironic is it that our nation's most trusted news anchor/journalist is a...*gasp*...COMEDIAN...and our supposed journalists are actually ill-informed, ill-tempered, bowtie-wearing simpletons? I suppose it's has always been that way...in times when journalists were more interested in maintaining their status in the DC social scene than comforting the afflicted and afflicting the comfortable, it's been the comedians and humorists like HL Mencken, Will Rogers, and Lenny Bruce who cut through the bullshit and lies and told people the truth about what was going on.
And it doesn't end there...if you wondered why all those high-profile beltway pundits start to sound the same after awhile, it's probably because Karl Rove and Ketchum, Inc., are faxing their scripts to them. My Payola. As I've mentioned before...the Republican Party never met a turd of a policy they can't polish to a golden luster with a slick PRopaganda campaign. Even though a chagrined Anderson offers a half-hearted "Muh-fault" and apologizes for getting caught, one has to wonder...how many others in the media are on the take?
Just think of the run-up to the Iraq war, when nobody in the media dared show a dissenting voice, or any trace of protest...how many of those high-priced hos in the broadcast and print media were stuffing C-notes in their garters while thoughts of swimming pools, summer homes and a new Lexus flashed in their greedy minds? How many now are cashing checks and working overtime to convince viewers and readers we need to destroy Social Security to save it?
The line between independent critic and paid propagandist has been fading for a long time now, and is in danger of being erased. The Venerable New York Times, of all media outlets, is hardly in a position to pass judgment--they should consider their employ of Judith Miller and all of her phony Iraq WMD "reporting" before casting aspersions on Anderson. Give FOX a break...at least they're honest (in a Newspeak, 1984-type way) about whose side they're on.
Expect an uproar from the press in the coming weeks...that is, if their checks from the RNC don't clear. Some will even complain that they weren't getting bigger payouts from the White House. The outrage! Poor Tucker could probably buy an actual adult's wardrobe with all that loot--certainly that blackguard traitor Novak could afford a better set of dentures and some Lee Press-on eyebrows. You guys got sandbagged!
"I can easily sit here and criticize the administration," said Anderson. Which is exactly what the White House is doing...blaming the previous administration for doing it first, and doing it worst. Hey, deflecting blame on the Zelig-like Bill Clinton has worked well for the last four years, why change tactics now?
by at 9:25 AM
i love to make predictions on this site. i like to think they're gutsy, no matter how ridiculous they may seem at the time. but it's even better when i'm right! Week of 9/1/04
it was horrific football season for the bears this year, going 5-11 as predicted. that was worse than the detroit lions. that was worse than the houston texans. that was even worse than the lowly arizona cardinals. a humiliating season indeed.
the defense is not as good as people in this fair city will have you to believe, but it was much better than what the offense showed. terry shea was rightfully shit-canned yesterday. he has no business standing on the sideline of a professional football field calling plays. w. bush is a better organizer than that douchebag.
but the abysmal season wasn't entirely shea's fault. it would be silly to say that. the offenseive line died like wounded dogs out there, with the exception of the second game of the season. sure wrecked grossman blew up his knee, but if he didn't, rest assured he would have had massive concussions, bruised ribs and two broken arms. he got off easy this year.
and still grossman would have had nobody to throw the ball to. there were far too many dropped passes and blown routes. it is a sad state of affairs when your running back, thomas jones, leads the team in receptions.
chicago is great town, but not if you're a football fan. no my friends, it is four long, agonizing months of pain and torture. i could say, "there's always next year," but i'd be lying to myself and insulting your intelligence.
it was horrific football season for the bears this year, going 5-11 as predicted. that was worse than the detroit lions. that was worse than the houston texans. that was even worse than the lowly arizona cardinals. a humiliating season indeed.
the defense is not as good as people in this fair city will have you to believe, but it was much better than what the offense showed. terry shea was rightfully shit-canned yesterday. he has no business standing on the sideline of a professional football field calling plays. w. bush is a better organizer than that douchebag.
but the abysmal season wasn't entirely shea's fault. it would be silly to say that. the offenseive line died like wounded dogs out there, with the exception of the second game of the season. sure wrecked grossman blew up his knee, but if he didn't, rest assured he would have had massive concussions, bruised ribs and two broken arms. he got off easy this year.
and still grossman would have had nobody to throw the ball to. there were far too many dropped passes and blown routes. it is a sad state of affairs when your running back, thomas jones, leads the team in receptions.
chicago is great town, but not if you're a football fan. no my friends, it is four long, agonizing months of pain and torture. i could say, "there's always next year," but i'd be lying to myself and insulting your intelligence.
by at 5:16 PM
Happy New Year, everybody. Man, the Christmas season really lasted a long time this year, huh? No sooner had that tsunami hit Indonesia than all that Happy Holidays Horseshit dried up like a snowstorm in the Sahara...faster than you could shout "bah, humbug," all that Peace on Earth, Good Will to Men, Love thy Neighbor crap was tossed out with the tree and giftwrap. Suddenly all those good Christians who dutifully read "A Christmas Carol" every year lapsed back into pre-epiphany "fuck-you-I-got-mine" Ebeneezer Scrooge, shuttering their hearts and minds for another 364 days.
I wonder how they'll celebrate Easter this year...invading another country and blowing up a few thousand civilians?
Truly, their beliefs are as sanguine as a plastic Baby Jesus. And to show the world how little the US cares about the whole thing, Bush sends Bill Clinton--whose response to the disaster the administration openly mocked just a week before--to put a happy face on the White House's stunningly obtuse reaction.
To paraphrase that cold, heartless matriarch Barbara Bush: why should they ruin their beautiful minds worrying about stuff like that? For them, bad policy blunders are nothing that a slick PR campaign can't resolve. As in Iraq, they'll just dispatch some lackey to "feel their pain" and hand out a few packages of rice that will look nice for a photo op...there, that band-aid is helping that sucking chest wound heal up already!
Meanwhile, Bush and Cheney remain hard at work creating the pain millions will feel in the USA, as they try to dismantle the New Deal; and in Iraq, as they continue to press for elections the people don't want.
Here's to hoping 2005 turns out better than 2004...it's already off to a wobbly start.
I wonder how they'll celebrate Easter this year...invading another country and blowing up a few thousand civilians?
Truly, their beliefs are as sanguine as a plastic Baby Jesus. And to show the world how little the US cares about the whole thing, Bush sends Bill Clinton--whose response to the disaster the administration openly mocked just a week before--to put a happy face on the White House's stunningly obtuse reaction.
To paraphrase that cold, heartless matriarch Barbara Bush: why should they ruin their beautiful minds worrying about stuff like that? For them, bad policy blunders are nothing that a slick PR campaign can't resolve. As in Iraq, they'll just dispatch some lackey to "feel their pain" and hand out a few packages of rice that will look nice for a photo op...there, that band-aid is helping that sucking chest wound heal up already!
Meanwhile, Bush and Cheney remain hard at work creating the pain millions will feel in the USA, as they try to dismantle the New Deal; and in Iraq, as they continue to press for elections the people don't want.
Here's to hoping 2005 turns out better than 2004...it's already off to a wobbly start.
by at 4:56 PM