Man, I have to get off my ass and post more often. It has been so hot that its hard to concentrate on writing entertaining things for the log. But thereís soooo much news on the Knife of Simpson front!
First of all, I saw a truly awe- inspiring show on Thursday. The opening band was not too good so Iím not writing about that. However, Fireball Ministry more than made up for it, with their ìMaiden Meets Sabbathî grooves and amazing dual-guitar work. (Those girls are so cute!) Up next was Altamont, featuring Dale Crover. Most of my friends came to the show expecting to see Croverís huge moose cock drums to be dragged on stage, and were vocally disappointed when he showed up with a guitar. However, Altamont put on such a good show that no one complained after they were finished. Although many of the songs hovered in the ìNugent-Uriah Heepî spectrum, there were a few moment when they were giving the Melvins themselves lessons in sludgy madness. And Spirit Caravan? They just crushed. I havenít seen a smoother guitar player than Wino in years. Nobody plays like that anymore, not since John Sykesí Blue Murder cheesefest anyway, and hearing it in such a heavy context was astounding. The entire band played with total precision AND power. Pussies who left early missed the best cover of Sabbathís ìWicked Worldî Iíve ever heard. I wonít soon forget that show, I think itís going to find its way into the K-oS vocabulary in time. You canít NOT be influenced by something like that.
And Sherman from Spirit Caravan thinks the name Knife of Simpson is ìfuckiní heavy as hell!î (*picture Sherman making a huge stabbing motion over his head while saying this.*) We discussed it over a cup of T backstage.
First of all, I saw a truly awe- inspiring show on Thursday. The opening band was not too good so Iím not writing about that. However, Fireball Ministry more than made up for it, with their ìMaiden Meets Sabbathî grooves and amazing dual-guitar work. (Those girls are so cute!) Up next was Altamont, featuring Dale Crover. Most of my friends came to the show expecting to see Croverís huge moose cock drums to be dragged on stage, and were vocally disappointed when he showed up with a guitar. However, Altamont put on such a good show that no one complained after they were finished. Although many of the songs hovered in the ìNugent-Uriah Heepî spectrum, there were a few moment when they were giving the Melvins themselves lessons in sludgy madness. And Spirit Caravan? They just crushed. I havenít seen a smoother guitar player than Wino in years. Nobody plays like that anymore, not since John Sykesí Blue Murder cheesefest anyway, and hearing it in such a heavy context was astounding. The entire band played with total precision AND power. Pussies who left early missed the best cover of Sabbathís ìWicked Worldî Iíve ever heard. I wonít soon forget that show, I think itís going to find its way into the K-oS vocabulary in time. You canít NOT be influenced by something like that.
And Sherman from Spirit Caravan thinks the name Knife of Simpson is ìfuckiní heavy as hell!î (*picture Sherman making a huge stabbing motion over his head while saying this.*) We discussed it over a cup of T backstage.
by at 4:04 PM
I saw Quadrophenia last night. You know something? My favorite parts are when the Mods get the shit kicked out of them by the rockers. And when the dude gets his scooter run over. I think I missed the point.
by at 9:06 AM
IN THE NEWS:
CHANDRA LEVY IS STILL MISSING!!!!!!
GENERALISIMO FRANCISCO FRANCO IS STILL DEAD!!!!
HAVE A GOOD NIGHT!!!!!
CHANDRA LEVY IS STILL MISSING!!!!!!
GENERALISIMO FRANCISCO FRANCO IS STILL DEAD!!!!
HAVE A GOOD NIGHT!!!!!
by at 8:42 AM
Here's a great one fer y'all Jesus-lovin folk. Incase the hyperlink doesn't work, which it never seems to, go to the following URL fer a sacrelicious good time: www.jesusdressup.com
by at 7:33 PM
Every time I watch the TV news or log onto any number of news websites as of late I've been bombarded by the same two damn stories: the disappearance of former Rep. Condit intern Chandra Levy and the 8 year old kid who was attacked by a shark. Here's my two cents on both topics...
NO ONE FUCKING GIVES A SHIT! THIS IS NOT NEWS! CUT IT OUT, FUCKERS!
Item 1, Chandra Levy. Who really gives a shit? This is nothing but a cut-rate post-OJ press event in which the horribly un-photogenic Gary Condit wobbles from one federal building to another like a toeless refugee while the inept DC police wander lacadaisically in suburban wooded areas for a few weeks. If her corpse-- that is, if she's really dead-- is somewhere in those verysame wooded areas then neither the police nor the FBI will ever find her because these people-funded sleuths are the laziest bunch of slobs I've ever seen. Watch the news and you'll see for yourself. If this drama were missing that toad-like and uglier-than-William H. Macy-mug of Condit or the sleepy sorority girl cum Glamour Shots sexuality of Levy, then not one wolf-eared reporter would be working the case. And if she had been an intern at, say, Columbia Pictures or Phillip Morris, anywhere but with the federal government, then no one would be paying attention. This story is really getting on my nerves.
Item 2, Shark Boy. Last I heard, US children were sending the contents of their piggybanks to this hapless bedridden chap. Know what I hope for now? That the whole schlemiel is a hoax, a great big All-American fraud. That would crush yew few remaining optimists, eh? Honestly, this kid is lucky to be alive but I really don't have much sympathy for him. For one, because I am fully aware of the aggressive nature and the likely presence of sharks, let alone the virile amount of trash and refuse and industrial waste also there, I don't go swimming in any body of water in the United States. I don't go traipsing through the desolate, barren, spaghetti-western hillocks of the America SW b/c I don't like snakes. I don't go camping in the woods b/c bears insist that vegetarians taste better than carnivores. I don't frequent gay bars b/c, well, I'm not gay. See a trend here? This is exactly the type of foolishness (white) humans present to themselves on a daily basis, that since they firmly believe themselves to the ruling species of the planet then they are entitled to the spoils, pre-existing species, genus, races, creeds, sexes, et al be damned. Imagine if this 8 yr old dope was black or Latino. Do you really believe that the story would be generating the type amount of press? Of course not. The white corporate-owned media would be shocked that the minority kid was swimming in the first place.
In sum, FU, journalistic America. Get yer shit together and focus on the real stories.
NO ONE FUCKING GIVES A SHIT! THIS IS NOT NEWS! CUT IT OUT, FUCKERS!
Item 1, Chandra Levy. Who really gives a shit? This is nothing but a cut-rate post-OJ press event in which the horribly un-photogenic Gary Condit wobbles from one federal building to another like a toeless refugee while the inept DC police wander lacadaisically in suburban wooded areas for a few weeks. If her corpse-- that is, if she's really dead-- is somewhere in those verysame wooded areas then neither the police nor the FBI will ever find her because these people-funded sleuths are the laziest bunch of slobs I've ever seen. Watch the news and you'll see for yourself. If this drama were missing that toad-like and uglier-than-William H. Macy-mug of Condit or the sleepy sorority girl cum Glamour Shots sexuality of Levy, then not one wolf-eared reporter would be working the case. And if she had been an intern at, say, Columbia Pictures or Phillip Morris, anywhere but with the federal government, then no one would be paying attention. This story is really getting on my nerves.
Item 2, Shark Boy. Last I heard, US children were sending the contents of their piggybanks to this hapless bedridden chap. Know what I hope for now? That the whole schlemiel is a hoax, a great big All-American fraud. That would crush yew few remaining optimists, eh? Honestly, this kid is lucky to be alive but I really don't have much sympathy for him. For one, because I am fully aware of the aggressive nature and the likely presence of sharks, let alone the virile amount of trash and refuse and industrial waste also there, I don't go swimming in any body of water in the United States. I don't go traipsing through the desolate, barren, spaghetti-western hillocks of the America SW b/c I don't like snakes. I don't go camping in the woods b/c bears insist that vegetarians taste better than carnivores. I don't frequent gay bars b/c, well, I'm not gay. See a trend here? This is exactly the type of foolishness (white) humans present to themselves on a daily basis, that since they firmly believe themselves to the ruling species of the planet then they are entitled to the spoils, pre-existing species, genus, races, creeds, sexes, et al be damned. Imagine if this 8 yr old dope was black or Latino. Do you really believe that the story would be generating the type amount of press? Of course not. The white corporate-owned media would be shocked that the minority kid was swimming in the first place.
In sum, FU, journalistic America. Get yer shit together and focus on the real stories.
by at 5:14 PM
Just remember, kids: Phillip Morriscares about you. A whole fucking lot. (From World Socialist Web Site.)
Casuistry blacker than Orwellís nightmares. It's a good thing these people don't control our government. Oh, wait, they already do.
Casuistry blacker than Orwellís nightmares. It's a good thing these people don't control our government. Oh, wait, they already do.
by at 3:22 PM
Who the hell are Sabbath and Mountain? What the fuck are yew talkin about, son? That there's blasphemy, ya sumbitch, sayin we rip off somebody I never even heard of. We're just plain old-timey country blues folk playin on big old analogue equipment whose wires just happened to short out, which somehow sent us packing through a gap in the time-space continuum. Yew got some nerve, friend... but I'll admit, those Bottom chicks sure are tasty morsels t' gander at. BTW, I'm the only drummer yew should be having illicit thoughts of.
Five more weeks til Bonham-fest...
Yesterday I started reading the autobiography of Haing Ngor, a Cambodian gentleman who survived the Khmer Rouge regime and the Killing Fields to escape to America (he also portrayed interpreter Dith Pran in Roland Jaffe's film, "The Killing Fields", subsequently garnering an Academy Award for Best Supporting Actor). Let me just say that it is one of the most harrowing, mesmerizing, gripping, terrifying, nerve-wracking tales I've ever encountered. By nature I'm a rather slow reader (I love words), yet I plowed through 200 pages in a matter of hours. 200 more to go. And to think that the United States had such an instrumental role in this affair, too, just short of issuing the rise of the brutally communist Khmer Rouge!
Five more weeks til Bonham-fest...
Yesterday I started reading the autobiography of Haing Ngor, a Cambodian gentleman who survived the Khmer Rouge regime and the Killing Fields to escape to America (he also portrayed interpreter Dith Pran in Roland Jaffe's film, "The Killing Fields", subsequently garnering an Academy Award for Best Supporting Actor). Let me just say that it is one of the most harrowing, mesmerizing, gripping, terrifying, nerve-wracking tales I've ever encountered. By nature I'm a rather slow reader (I love words), yet I plowed through 200 pages in a matter of hours. 200 more to go. And to think that the United States had such an instrumental role in this affair, too, just short of issuing the rise of the brutally communist Khmer Rouge!
by at 5:34 PM
Oh joyous day....
I finally got a computer at home! So, hopefully you can expect some more stuff: our own Knife of Simpson site, photos, some new features and links, and one glorious day, maybe some sound samples. Although I'm against the MP3 format Don't worry, we're still going to write this stuff and it will still be a main feature of the page. Hopefully, if we get it right more people than just Danny will read it. I'm going to take it upon myself to master this Blogger thing. That also means I can update at home instead of work. (I know, I'm doing it from work now, so fuck off.)
I need to strengthen my resolve to bring my camera everywhere I go. I see so much cool stuff every day that needs to be posted here. For example, I could have had a great photo of a cop nearly running down a bicyclist by disobeying a red light. Or the junkies that shoot up in the middle of the day on the median at Sacramento and Armitage.
I saw the band Bottom last night. They're cool, three girls on the same wavelength as Knife of Simpson. (In other words, we rip off Sabbath and Mountain.) The drummer was incredible. I've always maintained that there is NOTHING sexier than a good female drummer. (Except maybe a black female drummer. Like that chick in Lenny Kravitz' band. Sexier than Jenny McCarthy, I tell you!) The girls are true rock warriors: They're based in NYC, and rents are so high they don't even have a place to live, so apparently they just tour all of the time and live in the van. That's cool.
I finally got a computer at home! So, hopefully you can expect some more stuff: our own Knife of Simpson site, photos, some new features and links, and one glorious day, maybe some sound samples. Although I'm against the MP3 format Don't worry, we're still going to write this stuff and it will still be a main feature of the page. Hopefully, if we get it right more people than just Danny will read it. I'm going to take it upon myself to master this Blogger thing. That also means I can update at home instead of work. (I know, I'm doing it from work now, so fuck off.)
I need to strengthen my resolve to bring my camera everywhere I go. I see so much cool stuff every day that needs to be posted here. For example, I could have had a great photo of a cop nearly running down a bicyclist by disobeying a red light. Or the junkies that shoot up in the middle of the day on the median at Sacramento and Armitage.
I saw the band Bottom last night. They're cool, three girls on the same wavelength as Knife of Simpson. (In other words, we rip off Sabbath and Mountain.) The drummer was incredible. I've always maintained that there is NOTHING sexier than a good female drummer. (Except maybe a black female drummer. Like that chick in Lenny Kravitz' band. Sexier than Jenny McCarthy, I tell you!) The girls are true rock warriors: They're based in NYC, and rents are so high they don't even have a place to live, so apparently they just tour all of the time and live in the van. That's cool.
by at 4:04 PM
Six long arduous weeks until....
THE KIT OF PENULTIMATE DOOM.
Maybe sooner. I hope sooner. BTW, it's "penultimate", rather than "ultimate", b/c, like Pearl Harbor, I don't want to overhype it (ha, ha).
knife of simpson... knife of simpson... knife of simpson... knife of simpson... knife of simpson... I like that name. That or Joseph McCarthy and the Liberal Corporate Pig-Fucking Armada of Cuban Nationalist Socialist Bathroom Police Rapists of the Greater Metropolitan Area.
THE KIT OF PENULTIMATE DOOM.
Maybe sooner. I hope sooner. BTW, it's "penultimate", rather than "ultimate", b/c, like Pearl Harbor, I don't want to overhype it (ha, ha).
knife of simpson... knife of simpson... knife of simpson... knife of simpson... knife of simpson... I like that name. That or Joseph McCarthy and the Liberal Corporate Pig-Fucking Armada of Cuban Nationalist Socialist Bathroom Police Rapists of the Greater Metropolitan Area.
by at 4:54 PM
Oh, here's one really good band name: RED 17
It guarantees whoever uses the name will never play at a Republican convention.
It guarantees whoever uses the name will never play at a Republican convention.
by at 9:05 AM
Just for yucks, here's Hunter S. Thompson on baseball, and baseball's First Citizen:
Baseball sucks. The World Series is a Fraud and the New York Yankees are a gang of sleazy gold-plated toads. The only pleasure I get out of the Sports section these days is checking the American League standings and seeing the Texas Rangers in last place. ... Ho ho. Good ol' A-Rod, eh? Money means nothing to those jackass thieves in Texas. They are Friends of the goofy Child President, and they are selling enough oil and Energy to the State of California every day of the week to make poor A-Rod's $250 million salary look like chicken feed.
Baseball sucks. The World Series is a Fraud and the New York Yankees are a gang of sleazy gold-plated toads. The only pleasure I get out of the Sports section these days is checking the American League standings and seeing the Texas Rangers in last place. ... Ho ho. Good ol' A-Rod, eh? Money means nothing to those jackass thieves in Texas. They are Friends of the goofy Child President, and they are selling enough oil and Energy to the State of California every day of the week to make poor A-Rod's $250 million salary look like chicken feed.
by at 4:46 PM
Robot Johnson
Karma Sutra
Cockopolis
On-and-on-and-onanism
(Hey, you didnít say they had to be good names!)
Gynosaur
Gyno Jr.
The Fibonacci Sequence
Vomitocracy
Karma Sutra
Cockopolis
On-and-on-and-onanism
(Hey, you didnít say they had to be good names!)
Gynosaur
Gyno Jr.
The Fibonacci Sequence
Vomitocracy
by at 3:08 PM
I love this photo.
by at 9:09 AM
Cool, Lawless, you just wrote the band bio!
Here's a few ideas of mine. (Naturally no one has written in yet! Come on fuckers!)
The Steak
Beatloaf
The Five Aces
Gas Grass or Ass
Thunderpuss
The Wrestling Boot Band
SEND US SOME SUGGESTIONS!
Here's a few ideas of mine. (Naturally no one has written in yet! Come on fuckers!)
The Steak
Beatloaf
The Five Aces
Gas Grass or Ass
Thunderpuss
The Wrestling Boot Band
SEND US SOME SUGGESTIONS!
by at 2:18 PM
What's so bad about Knife of Simpson? If there is any evidence of racism or other offensiveness implicit within the title then I for one am completely oblivious to it. What's so offensive about it? Beats the hell outta me. Anal Cunt? That's an offensive name. Dripping Aborted Fetus? Yup, that's offensive, too. Limp Bizkit? Staind? Korn? They're offensive not only for their useless mopey innane music, but also for appropriating the bygone technique of misspelled-band name-masquerading-as-street cred-hip-coolness. (I thought we moved beyond that way back in 1989? Trixter, anyone?)
It's the duty-- no, the moral imperative-- of Knife of Simpson to stand tall and bald-faced in this era of scrawny chest-thumping thuggery. We have the cahones, musically and physiologically, to deliver a one-two combination that can and will thwart the attempts of nu metal to subvert future generations into the lackluster morass of what we currently coin as music. Remember well, grasshopper, that groups like Limp Bizkit obfuscate the ultimate goals of music: to enlighten, to socialize, to entertain, to unite, to progress the mind and body. Limp Bizkit wields mighty influence and only Knife of Simpson-- okay, maybe Nebula and Astroqueen and Cathedral, too-- can don the caped crusader vestments and save our children. Think of the children! The children!!!!
Knife of Simpson is about progressive politics and the socialization of today's youth. Knife of Simpson is a band with an aggressive, unifying sound. Knife of Simpson is a name and a name only. Our music and our message don't convey offensiveness, so if the name even moderately purports such... so be it. It's not like we're called Hitler's Glory or White is Right. Now THAT's offensive. Something else that's certainly offensive is Lynyrd Skynyrd's flagrant use of the Stars and Bars, even today. Somehow they get away with it and I'm certai that some of their predilections run the Jesse Helms gamut.
Nevertheless, I am willing to hear any suggestions people might have. In fact, I'll compose some over the next few days. But I felt it necessary to defend the name.
It's the duty-- no, the moral imperative-- of Knife of Simpson to stand tall and bald-faced in this era of scrawny chest-thumping thuggery. We have the cahones, musically and physiologically, to deliver a one-two combination that can and will thwart the attempts of nu metal to subvert future generations into the lackluster morass of what we currently coin as music. Remember well, grasshopper, that groups like Limp Bizkit obfuscate the ultimate goals of music: to enlighten, to socialize, to entertain, to unite, to progress the mind and body. Limp Bizkit wields mighty influence and only Knife of Simpson-- okay, maybe Nebula and Astroqueen and Cathedral, too-- can don the caped crusader vestments and save our children. Think of the children! The children!!!!
Knife of Simpson is about progressive politics and the socialization of today's youth. Knife of Simpson is a band with an aggressive, unifying sound. Knife of Simpson is a name and a name only. Our music and our message don't convey offensiveness, so if the name even moderately purports such... so be it. It's not like we're called Hitler's Glory or White is Right. Now THAT's offensive. Something else that's certainly offensive is Lynyrd Skynyrd's flagrant use of the Stars and Bars, even today. Somehow they get away with it and I'm certai that some of their predilections run the Jesse Helms gamut.
Nevertheless, I am willing to hear any suggestions people might have. In fact, I'll compose some over the next few days. But I felt it necessary to defend the name.
by at 12:36 PM
We had a discussion the other day at band practice about the name of the band. You see, when the band was named, I didn't see any reason that Knife of Simpson would be offensive. Well, I knew it was offensive insomuch that a wealthy ex-athlete got away with murder, but I never thought I'd be accused of racism. That was the furthest thing from my mind, until someone brought it up that it might be a bad thing to call a band. The Renegade family is particularly concerned with their boy's safety.
So, I thought I'd open it up to you, the readers. (If there are any!) What would be a good name for a band that sounds like Mountain?(No Danny, not including "Up the Butt Scottie." It's currently being used as we found out this weekend.) So, shoot us a mail and give us some ideas! I'll post mine tomorrow, because I have to go home now. Bye Bye.
So, I thought I'd open it up to you, the readers. (If there are any!) What would be a good name for a band that sounds like Mountain?(No Danny, not including "Up the Butt Scottie." It's currently being used as we found out this weekend.) So, shoot us a mail and give us some ideas! I'll post mine tomorrow, because I have to go home now. Bye Bye.
by at 3:55 PM